More thoughts on my road to rome…

I am a digger, I have a need to know things and (good or bad) I rarely trust any one person, when it comes to issues of faith I get even more critical.
As I start this journey to see where the Roman road takes me, I’m doing research (lots of it, I had my kindle and my NET bible out today digging).

The key issues I have today with Catholicism are as follows:

• Marian Theology
• Perpetual Virginity Of Mary
• Praying to the saints for intercession
• Pergatory

The other issues I can deal with, I’ve already pretty much settled the following:

• Peter as the first pope
• The Apocrypha and it’s place in the canon
• The Catholic Church as the original church
• Catholic authority on scripture
• Transubstantiation

I’ve been reading some very good books written by Evangelicals who have converted to Catholicism, here is the current list:

Born Fundamentalist, Born Again Catholic – By David Currie

For me this book has been a complete eye opener, he uses language I’m familiar with and does a very good job showing where the Catholic Church is right on so many issues, I didn’t buy the perpetual virginity argument, that’s not to say he’s wrong. I just need more evidence and research (there’s more out there), undoubtedly the Church Fathers believed in the PV of Mary, but I have to question whether it’s fact or wishful thinking. Bear in mind that Marriage is a God ordained institution and that sex in marriage is considered holy, so if Mary had other children she would still be fully holy and worthy.

What Catholics Really Believe – By Karl Keating

Ok Book, not what I expected, it doesn’t really cover many topics I’m interested in and doesn’t go into the depth that Currie does, it may grow on me yet.

On Being Catholic – Thomas Howard

A good book, it’s an interesting read. It was the first book I read on conversion. It hasn’t full sunk in yet, but the writing is very good. I just wish he would spend more time hammering home his ideas in more detail. But for those searching it’s a good start.

There are also some great sites that contain conversion stories, the best one I’ve found is here: Convert Journal, great stories to read, I’ve been through almost all of them and found most people on the same road that I’m on.

All good resources…

I am noticing a trend, almost all of the people who convert like I do, end up doing a great deal of research. Sometimes taking years, but all go into this decision very thoughtfully and once there, grow in their faith. It’s essentially what I’m doing and what I did when I ran into Double Predestination, I researched until I settled that Calvin, Beza and the reformed followers are wrong (another post for another time). But this feels very different, I feel called, I can’t explain it better than that. The more I look the more I feel the pull…

This last Sunday we attended Mass at Holy Apostle in Meridian Idaho, Michelle led the way in and sat in the middle of the pews!!, I wanted to hide in the back. I was nervous because I felt like an interloper, I did enjoy Mass very much and thought the Father did a great job. But during the Eucharist I stayed seated, I should have gone up for a blessing but when your already nervous the last thing you want to do is go up. We did contact the Church about the RCIA program and if I could meet with the Father at some point, I know he’s busy but I have questions before I even get started. This is all new to me and when you have heard SOOO many bad things, you can’t help but be apprehensive.

So I’m hoping this week they contact us and we can setup a time, I’ll keep attending Mass, but I’ll hide somewhere in the back!!!

The Journey Continues…

Blessings
-Paul-

Finding the end of the road

For the past year Michelle and I have been on a journey to find a new home church, we have made some great friends along the way, and made some disturbing discoveries. It’s been comical at times, and painful most of the time. We’ve grown in ways we didn’t expect, I’ve been able to deepen my understanding of my faith and I finally figured out what I was looking for. The problem was and still is that I can’t find it anywhere, my belief hasn’t changed, but my needs have. What started out as an emotional journey in the pentecostal faith has ended in the most surprising of places, if you would have asked me a year ago where I would end up. Anglican or Catholic would have not been my answer, in fact neither would have entered my mind.

But we have found that the early church fathers had something we simply don’t have today, they understood their faith at a much deeper level, they worshiped with more reverence and less nonsense than what we see today. Sadly even in some parts of the Anglican faith modernism has wormed it’s way in, the Episcopal church is self destructing in America. The Anglican church from Africa is doing missions here in the states, but it’s just starting and our experience was that as opposed to being historic, it was more emerging with a combination of the historic. It did however leave a huge mark on us, and we are Anglican more than anything else at this time.

The odd part comes in about three weeks ago, our youngest was out in California and we had time on our hands, so we tried a Catholic Mass. After all it could be called the mother church, Luther broke from it, Anglicans and Episcopalians broke from it and because of my background I never even thought of attending a mass (damn evil Catholics). Imagine my surprise when I found a service that was well planned, reverent and Christ centered. Certainly not the message I had heard from others, and to be honest I kind of liked it. It was a breath of fresh air, it was like the adult version of a liturgical service.

This doesn’t mean that I’m turning RCC just yet, but there is really no where else to go. I’ve already run into Luther and Calvin, I didn’t like either experience. I gave Lutheranism a couple of chances, but for all their bluster about respecting the service, we didn’t see it and nothing and I mean nothing turns me off more than a determinist on a mission. I have never in my life seen more twisting of scripture than you will find when someone is attempting to force Sovereignty down your throat. I’m certainly not an open theist so that’s out, Arminius was a good guy and I think he got the closest but all the churches who align with him twisted his message.

So in reality that only leaves two, and honestly, I’m tired of looking. I’m tired of churches who don’t know their own doctrine and think it’s fundamentalist to want to protect it, I’m tired of constantly being on guard. I just want to worship God, with reverence, with dedication and with other believers who feel the same. No more jeans and shorts, no more sloppy music or half baked hymns, no more trying to be modern. Christianity is old, Christ isn’t, but his church is and I want to worship at one that acts grown up.

I’m not sure where this leads if anywhere, Michael Spencer wrote about how he loved the RCC service, but had issues with their theology (like the perpetual virginity of Mary), which is interesting because he was a Calvinist and Calvin and Luther both believed the same theology about Mary. I’m reading Thomas Howard on his conversion to RCC and I’m starting to do my homework, maybe meet with the local Father and have some serious talks, doesn’t mean I’m committed but right now at this point in my life, I need something more mature and with some real history.

This is certainly a road less traveled for evangelicals, but I’m not alone, there is a movement called the Ancient-Future movement where people are tired of the Evangelical circus and are looking for the Ancient Ways, this could be my resting place for the forseeable future.

More to come as I reach what I hope is the end of the road.

-Paul-

Rethinking My Faith

For years while a member of the modern evangelical movement, I was caught in a trap of both works and trying to rely on my goodness to live my christian faith. It was a vicious cycle, because you can *never* be good enough, which then would lead to guilt, which would then lead to a re-committing of myself to God. But not long after this cycle was complete I would screw up and it would start over again, try living like this for years and you may start to understand the depth of my issues with the Evangelical church as it stands today.

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